Monday, October 31, 2011

Swanky Sweepin' Volume 5

Zombie bike  Unlimited entries, ends 11/26?
Fancy lingerie  Blog entries, ends 11/2

A LASER COMB. Ends 1/2/12
40,000 prizes. Yes. It's true. Ends 2/1/12 (enter the weird last name giveaway while you're at it)

Saturday, October 29, 2011

Everyday is Halloween

No, really. Everyday IS Halloween for me. I lose count when I try to put a number to the amount of skulls decorating my apartment. An antique silver "At Rest" plaque hangs above my bed. I have lots of Victorian photographs of strangers which amateurs tell me are "creepy". I own atleast 3 dresses that could be worn in a high school production of Chicago. I have collected so many corsets that more than one person I work with came to me to borrow one when they were putting their Halloween costumes together this year. And I'll admit, I have one or two pieces of (very tasteful) bat jewelry.

Friday, October 28, 2011

Lewd, Tattooed, and Interviewed...

Hey guys, we recently had the opportunity to be interviewed by our friend Kelly from Beauty Obsessed ! It is our first interview and we had a lot of fun with the questions. Head on over to her blog, and read what she has to say! And if you are here visiting from Beauty Obsessed, Welcome! Kick your shoes off (unless you have a serious case of cheese feet), and stay a while! 



Interview with Charlotte, Heather, Vanessa and Rita from Whoreders

Four ladies on the cutting edge of cutting corners

1. Mini Bio?

 Heather: Don't let the baby face trick you, she's a mean, sweepin', frugal machine.

Charlotte: A crazy couponing mom you would not want to approach at the playground.

Vanessa: Pinata princess and her little dog too(!), trying to remain fierce, yet, fiscally responsible. 

Rita: My name is Rita. Collecting glorious old things and creating on a dime is what I do. Sometimes it's really good and sometimes it's really bad. But it's all about the fun on the journey, right?

Get Nailed: By the Dead

Get nailed by the dead? Whoreders say what??? No I'm not talking about necrophilia you pervs, I'm talking about Obituary Newspaper nails, duh! So now you're probably even more confused which perhaps means that you are eagerly reading to find an answer to what all this cray cray-ness is about.
Well, I'll tell you, it's about this awesomeness!

Thursday, October 27, 2011

Matzo Ball Soup: How do I love thee?

It's the week before Halloween in New York City. In a perfect world, I'd be walking down Broadway after a long day at work, wearing a cute, fitted trench coat and sipping a pumpkin latte and maybe even kicking up some yellow and orange leaves under foot. The soundtrack on my iPod would be something dreamy like Fleet Foxes, Cocteau Twins, or classic Feist. Tonight was not that kind of autumnal evening. It was bone chilling, ice cold rain and wind. I could get some specifics from but let's just say it was a watery hell. Anyone remember "frog in a blender" from the early days of the internet? It's better if you don't but if by chance you do, you'll know how pretty much all of commuting Manhattan felt during rush hour tonight. During my short walk to the subway, my favorite leopard print umbrella spastically inverted itself not once but twice before breaking and ending up in a pile of other defeated, dead umbrellas (RIP). My cold, clammy hands turned an unhealthy shade of pink and my iPhone was getting an unwanted shower even though it was deep in my coat pocket. I'm pretty sure I even saw a little girl in tiny rain boots almost blow away before her father could save her. I couldn't get home and get dry fast enough. Once at my apartment and after peeling off my wet, chaffing jeans (the worst!) there was only one thing I could imagine warming my rain soaked, weathered, and slightly bittered soul: a  bowl of matzo ball soup. 

Angry Baby Lasered Cheeks

A long time ago in a far away land I barely remember... I was tanorexic. I know, it's hard to believe, but I loved it. I went tanning often and turned a lovely crispy brown, hiding all flaws and looking glow-y. I eventually stopped going, I don't remember why. I reverted back to my natural state - pale, sparkly white.
Years later I went camping, spent a little time in the sun, and came back home with BROWN SPOTS ON MY FACE. It was so bad a co-worker tried to smudge one off my forehead, thinking it was dirt. HOWDAREYOU.
I now religiously wear SPF products on my face and have tried a few bleaching creams. The poop stains are a little lighter, but still stare at me in the mirror every day. I cry.

Tuesday, October 25, 2011

The Bee's Knees

I've always been lucky with my skin, never having major issues like acne or scaliness. I've treated it well from a very young age, thanks to countless lectures from my mom (annoying, but she was right), and was rewarded with good skin. As I made my way into my 30s, I noticed it was changing and required more maintenance than before. My regular products weren't giving me the same results, I noticed dry spots even my most trusted moisturizer couldn't remedy.

And so began my search for a moisturizer suitable for my 30-something skin. I've been using Philosophy Hope In A Jar, I like it well enough but there was room for improvement. Enter Burt's Bees new sensitive line... I received the facial cleanser ($10) and daily moisturizer ($15) from BzzAgent, and it's the latter that has blown me away. It felt a bit heavy at first, and I lost a little hope. But once I let it absorb into my skin, I was pleasantly surprised. No greasy film, no wet feeling! Just smooth, perfectly moisturized skin. My biggest complaint about Philosophy is that it stung my eyes. Not that I'm in the habit of regularly smearing moisturizer into my eyes, but if it got anywhere near my eyes, they'd start to sting and tear up. After regular use of Burt's Bees, and the occasional contact with my eyes, I am pain and tear free!

I've been using both products for almost a month, and am loving them! My biggest praise is for the moisturizer, but the cleanser has been holding its own too. It's soap free, which I really like, and although it does feel a bit strange at first (it doesn't lather up the way normal washes do) I quickly noticed that my skin didn't feel tight or irritated after washing. There is also zero redness, something that always happens around my nose with other cleansers. Could it be that as I age like fine wine, and whine about aging, my skin has become more sensitive? Instead of looking for new anti-aging products, I should have been looking for something simpler and less harsh. So, is this it? Have my skin prayers been answered? Perhaps... it seems at least that my winter skin woes will be soothed by Burt's Bees Sensitive Daily.

My fellow Whoreder Charlotte found you some extra Burt's Bees savings! Just become a fan of Burt's Bees Facebook page by clicking the "Like" button for a $2 coupon. Thanks, Charlotte!

Monday, October 24, 2011

Oh Baby, It's Cold Outside

Some of you will read this blurb and not understand, but some of you will nod your head in empathetic agreement and sigh in relief that you are not alone with your crazy old dad. I have one of those dads who always reminds me that he had to walk one billion miles in the snow every day to get to school. He also claims he did this all in nothing but shorts, a t-shirt, and a sweater that his entire neighborhood took turns sharing. Someone, somewhere is exaggerating this story. It may be me, or it may be him. Either way, he instilled in me the importance of winter accessories. If I ever have to walk one trillion miles in a blizzard, at least i know I will look cute (on a budget) while doing it. Below are a few of my winter must haves!

Swanky Sweepin' Volume 4

Vespas (and other fun prizes) One winner a day, ends 11-23
Disneyland and other prizes  25 Disneyland vacations, 1000 Target gift cards, and a crapload of coloring books to be won. Ends 12/31
Xbox  30 winners, ends 11/15
Cooking stuffs  420 prizes, ends 11/29

Friday, October 21, 2011

Cheap Thrills: Painted Ladies

The countdown to Halloween is on, have you decided on a costume yet? If so, I may have dug up some goodies that will help you put the finishing touches on your disguise. If not, maybe this post will give you a little inspiration and guide you to towards the perfect Halloween getup. Grab your trick or treat bags, kids, and let's get shopping!

Thursday, October 20, 2011

Scary Savings

Here's a few more Halloween deals I found for you kids!

Free brain mold, just pay $2.95 shipping

Light up tombstone kit $9, free shipping to store (Walmart)

Get Nailed: Orale Ombre

Ombre is all over the place these days. First it was ombre hair, and now it's ombre nails! Ombre is a French word that quite literally means "shaded". Think, gradient colors. Since I am a (non) certified nail artist, I thought I would tackle the ombre nail for your viewing pleasure. There are three different ways you can do it.

Type 1: Take five shades of the same color and paint each nail a different shade. For a slightly more unique look, you can take one dark color that is your absolute fave, and on a flat non-porous surface (table top, Ziploc bag, paper plate, etc.) make four tiny puddles of polish. Next, add small amounts of white polish to each puddle to lighten them up, each to different shades of the same color.

This look is the most simple, and sort of reminds me of junior high. It is still pretty, but by farm the most simple of the three.

Type 2:
Take two contrasting shades (one lighter than the other) and using the lighter color, paint your nails as normal. While polish is still a bit tacky. Make sure you have a make-up wedge or an eye make up sponge applicator and dab it in the darker polish. Next, using the applicator, sponge it onto the nail, heavier on the tip, and lighter towards the middle.

This look was big on the Fall 2011 and Spring 2012 runways this year. They achieved this look by using an airbrush, but for those of us who can't afford to airbrush our nails all the time, I have a shortcut!You should get something like this, which is my personal fave!

Type 3: I like to call this one the "candy corn effect". There are two ways that I know of to achieve this look. You can simply take three polishes and do three horizontal stripes across your nails. When almost dry, use a clear polish on the entire nail to blend the look. Another clever way to achieve this look is to use scotch tape, as seen here!

Tuesday, October 18, 2011

How Birchbox Has Cured My Fear of Commitment

Hello, my name is Charlotte, and I am what is known as a compromissphobe. In non-fancy speak, I am afraid of commitment, and I'm not talking about relationship commitment (I'm married for God's sake.) I'm talking about my irrational fear of commitment to make-up and other beauty products. Like most girls, I love me some beauty products; however, also like most girls (maybe I'm alone here?), I am notorious for trying a product once or twice, hating it, and returning the damn thing. It is a lot of effort for us lazy, indecisive people to go to a store, pick and buy an item, try and dislike that item, and then go back to return the item. It's a vicious cycle I can't seem to break.

Love to try, hate to buy, that's me in a nutshell. So what's a diva to do ? One word,  Birchbox. Birchbox is a beauty website that is free to peruse, and $10 monthly to become a member. What do you get for a meager ten dollars? "Each month, you'll receive a  selection of 4-5 samples that [Birchbox employees] have tried (and retried) [themselves].  You'll receive anything from skincare to makeup to cult beauty tools, from well-known brands as well as emerging gems." Compromissphobe say what ?!?

If that little shpeel didn't reel you in, I don't know what will. Oh wait, yes I do. Each month, Vanessa and I will be doing monthly reviews of our Birchboxes. We will show you what we receive, and give you our brutally honest opinion of the products. Birchbox has eased my fear of commitment by allowing me to try before I buy, and offering a discount if I decide to buy the full sized product (plus free shipping on all orders over $50)! If we inspire you to sign up, great, make sure to give us credit by  using our e-mail addresses for Charlotte or for Vanessa.

Swanky Sweepin' Volume 3

Anyone win anything yet? Don't worry if you haven't, it can take a while for you to hear back!


Trip to Costa Rica Ends 2/3/12. They are giving away 80 vacations! Yes, that's not a typo!

Monday, October 17, 2011

Get Nailed: Bloody Murder

What you will need:

Clear base coat
Red nail polish
Clear top coat
Toothpick (or other thin, pointed item)

How to do it:

1. As always, start with clean nails and apply a clear base coat.

2. Next, apply red only to the tips your nails a la French manicure, but messier. I used Revlon in Raven  Red.

3. Then, take a pointed tip item like a toothpick, I used a rubber flossing stick (yes,I'm serious) and using the same red polish, drag down from the tip to make thin "drippings" on your nails. This is what will give your nails that "I cut my fingertip off" look.

4. Lastly, apply your clear top coat to get that glossy, bloody finish & enjoy!

Your finished product should look something like this!

Pennies From Heaven

When I was a little kid, my mom and dad regularly gave me all their spare change to play with - I'd count it, stack it and (naturally) pocket it. I used to save it all in a big hamburger shaped bank I got in Tijuana, then spend it on my favorite childhood addictions: candy, Bop Magazine, records and Bonnie Bell Lip Smackers. So what's that got to do with this post and that saucy Abe Lincoln winking at you up there? Lemme tell ya...

Sunday, October 16, 2011

$30 For Free @ One Kings Lane !

One Kings Lane....what's all the fuss about? Membership is free, and members "get insider access to daily sales events, featuring furniture, lighting, decorative accessories, great gifts, food & wine—all at up to 70% off retail."

If you sign up for Onekingslane and you are new to the site, you will get a $15 credit, and if you use the code "get-inspired" at check-out, it takes $15 off a $30 purchase, so you have a chance of getting a $30 item free! Just make sure it is $30 before tax! This could be awesome for a Christmas present, a "white elephant" gift, or a chance to spoil yourself!

Go forth and go cray cray!

Friday, October 14, 2011

Ghoulish Garb

Hello. I made you an Etsy Treasury list of great Halloween/creepy/horror inspired clothing and accessories for under $40:

You're welcome again.

Photo by the lovely Shannon Brooke.

Cheap Thrills: Halloween Treats

Halloween kicks of the three months of holiday feasting - and chances are you're going to be invited to a party this Halloween, or maybe you've decided to throw a bash of your own. So now that you've got your costume all sorted out, the big question is what kinds of delicious Halloween treats will you be creating? I've dug up some frighteningly cute things to help you get the  party started.

Thursday, October 13, 2011

Get Nailed: Once You Go Black...

Once you go black you never go back! I'm talking about nail polish of course you pervs!

What you will need:
Clear base coat
Base polish(es)
White Nail Pen
Clear top coat

How to do it:

1. As always, start with clean nails and apply a clear base coat.

Wednesday, October 12, 2011

Fifty Four Frightengly Frugal Flicks

Closer, please... clo-ser...

It's that time of the year, Clarice. Time to get spooky.

I made another cheap DVD list for you, free shipping on orders over $25.

You're welcome.

DIY: Stuffed Apples

Stuffed Crockpot Apples....MMM....People say these are easy and delicious, and those are two of my favorite things. I'm sure they would make an amazing dessert, but I went all fat kid on you, and made them for breakfast today.

What you will need:
6-8 Apples
Apple Corer or paring knife
1 Tbsp Cinnamon
3 Tbsp butter
1/3 cup Brown Sugar
1/4 cup chopped nuts
1.5 oz Raisins
1/2 cup of water
2-4 tsp of Vanilla Extract

Tuesday, October 11, 2011

DIY: Pore Strip

Dear Reader,
We will never be more intimate than we are after this post. Okay, that's probably not true, but prepare yourself anyways. I apologize in advance for any close up pictures you are about to see, where in lieu of make-up, I have glue on my face like an idiot.
So I recently heard from my husbands-sisters-boyfriends-doctors-probation agents-hairdresser that you can use glue on your nose in lieu of a pore strip. Say what ? No really, what the hell did I just say? Let's rewind. Someone, somewhere, told me that you can use plain white liquid school glue on your nose to make a "pore strip", so of course I had to try it.
After work yesterday, I went and got me some 69 cent school glue (which is a hell of a lot cheaper than $12 Biore pore strips, although I do love me some pore strips....). Make sure your face is clean of make-up and dirt, so wash and dry that mug of yours! Once dry, use your fingers to evenly spread the glue on to your nose in the shape of a pore strip. Make sure it's evenly layered or else it won't dry right.

Monday, October 10, 2011


I never thought I would be the mom that I am today, a mom that gets excited about diaper sales at CVS at 9:25 pm; a mom that gets so excited, she runs home and blogs about it by 9:45 pm. Well apparently I am that type of mom, because I just got back from CVS and immediately hopped on the computer to tell you this: CVS sells Huggies Slip-Ons (not my favorite, but they get the job done), for $21.99 per Jumbo Pack. They currently are running a BOGO 50% off on these packs. If you combine this deal with coupons, it breaks down to an amazing price point! (I think)

   $21.99 -original price
+ $21.99
   $43.98 - before coupons and discount
- $10.99 (50% off one)
-  $ 6.00 - 2 $3/1 Huggies Slip-Ons manufacturer coupons
-  $ 5.00 - $5 off $25 purchase at CVS when you use your EC card expires 10/10/2011 (TONIGHT!!!)
   $21.99 Total after all discounts and coupons!

It's like getting one package of diapers for FREEEEEE !!!!!

Columbus Day, How Could I Forget ????

Columbus Day is here, and I know that somewhere in history there is an important lesson about Indians or stealing peoples land or something, but all I really care about is the sales, and I have forgotten to share them all with you! What is wrong with me ? Here are the best of the best, but they are only good thru TONIGHT!

The Gap is offering up to 50% off of EVERYTHING! Yes, everything is on sale, and sadly it ends today. If you order online, there is no shipping fee for purchase over $50. Ends today!

K-Mart is 5-10% off of EVERYTHING! Also if you spend more then $75 you qualify for free shipping! Just enter coupon code “COLUMBUS” during checkout. Ends today!

Swanky Sweepin' Volume 2

It's that time of the week again. LET'S WIN STUFF.

Dish Network Ten entries per day allowed, 10 prizes a day to be won. Ends 10/31

Banana Republic 13 winners, ends 10/29

It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia Ten winners will get the sixth season, ends 10/15
Walk-on role on Breaking Bad Ends 1/16/12
Pink Mixer Six winners! Ends 1/11/12
Hipster Bike Ends 10/31
$100 gift card 15 winners, ends 10/14
A Fab Sparkly Vampire Party ends 10/14

P.s. The dog wants you to hear a song.

Saturday, October 8, 2011

Get Nailed : A Stitch in Time

What you will need:
Clear base coat
Base polish(es)
Black Nail Pen
Clear top coat

How to do it:

1. Start with clean nails and apply a clear base coat.

2. Next, I applied 2 coats of  Essie polish in Lilacism to my left hand, and 2 coats of Sally Hansen Mint Sorbet to my right hand. You can use any color you like, but try to stick with lighter colors, or the stitches won't really be visible (as shown below). Make sure to let the polish completely dry before going on to the next step.

3. Once nails are completely dry, take your Sally Hansen (or any brand really) black nail pen and randomly draw stitches. You can draw anywhere from 1 -  3 "sutures" on each nail, any more than three and it looks too busy.

4. Let the stitches dry, and follow with a clear top coat.

Your finished product should look something like this!

50 Fab DVDs for $6 or less

Skin tight jeans up to the jugs, flowing tufts of fluffy hair, leathery tanned skin, and baby blue eyeshadow. SEXY TIME.
I compiled another DVD list for you kids. Still $6 and under, free shipping and this time the theme is... you guessed it, the 1970s.

Be there or be square.

(By the way, we will try to keep the Amazon store updated with all the best deals we have found. One easy stop for your guiltless retail therapy)

Friday, October 7, 2011

How to: Donate Without Actually Donating

Times are tough, and people are pinching pennies everywhere. There are budget cuts being made left and right in the school system, affecting everything from what supplies our schools have (or don't have), to how many "in service days" are imposed in the shortened school year. Luckily, there are companies out there who still care. I have researched programs offered by five major companies, and gathered information for you readers. There are ways to donate to your local schools and you don't have to spend any additional money or buy things you wouldn't normally buy!

Box Tops for Education sponsored by General Mills
How does it work?
Clip some box tops, you know, those pointless pink squares on most of your food packages as well as many other products. You can earn boxtops when you shop online at stores like Walmart, Vans, and many other stores. You also have chances to win bonus boxtops through boxtop sweepstakes and by watching videos or taking surveys online for Ford Motor Company.

What schools can participate?
The Box Tops for Education program is available to any accredited public, private or parochial school, for grades K-8, in the United States.

If you have any questions, you can find a long list of FAQ's on their website, or contact their company by e-mail.

Cheap Thrills: Hallow-Bling

Halloween season is in full effect! I know Target has had Halloween decorations out for weeks, but I don't officially recognize Halloween season until after October 1st. So if you or someone you love is a Halloweener, I've got a list of goodies here that's sure to tickle their spooky pickle. Pretty sparkly things with a sinister flair, Hallow-Bling!

Welcome to the Ebates Hotel


It does exist. Kind of.

So, a few months back I stumbled across a website (Ebates) that claimed to give you money for shopping online. I was sceptical, but I liked the idea of getting a percentage back on my purchases, so I signed up. I didn't tell any friends about it until I actually received a check so that I knew it was legit.

Once I got the money... oh lordy, I was excited. I told all my friends and got a few of them to sign up too. Not only will they get paid to shop, but I get referral money added to my account and can even got bonuses if I sign up enough people.

Exciting, no?

So here's how it works:

Thursday, October 6, 2011

How to: Make Your Own Magnetic Make-up Board

Things you will need:
Hot glue
Hot glue gun
Sheet metal (thinnest gauge available)
Frame (size of your choice)
Picture Hooks
* Sheet metal scissors aka Tin snips
* Ruler & Pencil
* Metal file


Monday, October 3, 2011

Swanky Sweepin' Volume 1

Starting this week I'm going to make it my goal to give ya'll a weekly update of all the good sweepstakes I have found. It will be a short list, but will be the best of the best... in my opinion, anyway. I will give you sweepstakes with better odds or awesome prizes. Don't expect to see cars and houses on the list... the odds of winning those are horrible. Not that I don't enter them occasionally, but you understand. Might as well aim a little lower and get better results, right?

Daily entry:
Mad Men ends 12/31. 92 assorted Mad Men DVD prizes (one a day). Play games for more entries, save up or spend your entries as you please.
Pampered Chef prizes ends 10/31. 106 prizes

Saturday, October 1, 2011

Tits & Giggles

This is a post about a heavy subject...literally. Boobs. October 1st is the beginning of National Breast Cancer Awareness month. This results in people trying to make a profit off of all things pink, and scumball dudes who go by the name Dr. Juan A. Feelya, offering free mammograms in their van.

Not everyone has time to research who is legit and who are the horrible selfish people when it comes to buying things for a cause. I on the other hand, have loads of free time as a not so hard working office lady with unlimited access to the Internet. That being said, I have gathered a few legitimate sites and stores that carry fun & unique Breast Cancer Awareness items that donate a percentage of their proceeds to charities.