Friday, January 20, 2012

Cheap Thrills: Va-Va-Voom

Welcome to Cheap Thrills After Dark, a slightly naughtier version of our weekly contribution to your retail therapy. Valentine's Day is creeping closer and closer, and some people might be looking for something a little more pulse-quickening than a dozen roses. That's where I come in, if you want to be a little more daring but don't know where to start, I got you covered.

For anyone who isn't sure about sizing, here's a sneaky little tip: when your better half isn't looking, take a quick peek at a similar item in their wardrobe! Dudes who can't guess their lady's bra size, just look for the tag near those pesky hooks that have thwarted men for decades. You can even offer to take laundry duty for easy access clothing items. P.S., Never put the bras in the dryer! 

**A quick note about this edition, although there is no nudity within this post, there may be a few items you might consider NSFW (not safe for work) and would be awkward to explain to your boss or coworkers.  Some of the links do go to adults-only sites, but I will warn you ahead of time so you can click with caution. ** 

Back Seamed Nylons
There is nothing in this world I (and countless others) find sexier than a back seam running up your leg. This pair (featured in the photo above) from Plasticland are fishnet and also have a bow accent for some added wolf-whistle factor. You can find all sorts of styles with back seams, including these from Sears, something a little blingy from Torrid, or thigh highs from Sock Dreams. If you're buying them for your sweetheart and aren't sure of her size, consult the size charts available at most sites (or on the back of the package).

Nighties & Nightgowns
Now that I warmed you up with the stockings, let's venture into more evening wear, specifically nightgowns. They come in all shapes and sizes, from super short babydolls to longer nightgowns. This cute black and pink nightie pictured above is available at UrbanOG for $27.10 in sizes S/M or M/L. A great deal is this Black Lace Overlay Chemise for only $15! If you're looking for something for a curvier girl, Torrid has a this black and teal babydoll, and this black lace chemise. Rhonda Shear has this "Sweet Tease" Chemise in five colors, sizes XS - 4X. Looking for something a little longer? Macy's has this just-above-the-knee chemise at over 50% off until 1/22. Is your lovely lady a long sleeves only kind of girl? No problem, I found this more modest, but not frumpy, style at Macy's as well. If you think a longer nightgown can't inspire a seduction, this animal print nightgown from Nordstrom begs to differ.

No pain, no gain! The basic mindset behind the corset. They leave both the wearer and the watcher a little breathless, and are (in my opinion) well worth any discomfort. Aside from what it does for your body, the best thing about a corset is that they're available in every size. Need proof? The black and pink corset pictured here is from Corset, is only $27.99 and is available in sizes S - 6X. They've got tons more, so go nuts exploring their site and remember to bookmark it for Halloween! Fashion Corset Shop has their Leather & Lace Corset available in sizes S - 3X, Victoria's Secret has this Lace Corset Top 50% off for only $29.99 in sizes 0 to 12. Some corset sizes are based on band size (that's the bra size without the cup) while others are based on clothing size.

Men's Pajamas
The selection for men's sleepwear isn't quite as sexxxy as the women's, but it's not always about how much skin you're showing. You can make your man feel studly in his favorite style of pajamas. A classic pair like the ones above, available from the Gap in sizes XS - 2X, are only $19.99. Is your dude a little more fashion forward? I don't know why, but this snug pair of long johns from 2(x)ist reminds me of Jude Law. Bring out his wild side with these silk mini briefs from Bare Necessities, or keep the silky feel but go for  little more coverage with these silk boxers from ABC Underwear.

Don't freak out! I know pasties might be a little out of your comfort zone, but stay with me, we'll work this out together. It's Valentine's Day, inhibitions get thrown out the window. Whether you're going to be the one wearing them (perhaps for a sexy private strip tease) or giving them (if you know your lady has a great rack and a sense of humor and adventure), these can really ramp up your love life. Warning: these links will open to pages with some risque images that include semi-nudity. Etsy is the pasties treasure ground, you can find pretty much any shape/design there. The Red Stitch Hearts pictured here, Cupcakes for your cupcakes, "Hello Kitten", and a simple Polka-Dot Heart Shape. Pin Up Doll has these Apple or Cherry pasties for $13.95, and of course the classic Heart Shaped with Tassles!

Boudoir Photo
If you're too shy for a live strip tease, maybe a sexy photo shoot is more your speed? It isn't limited to racy lingerie and romance novel covers, if you know your love muffin likes a certain look, go for it! White oxford button-down shirt with nothing underneath, a jersey from their favorite sports team, or maybe strategic bits peeking out from under a bubble bath... use your imagination and your boo's likes as inspiration. The price for these photo shoots varies, but if you're on a budget you can set one up yourself. Do-it-yourself photo editing isn't as daunting as you might think, there are programs that will apply filters to make your point and shoot shots look close to professional. Use multiple shots to create a very special photo album for your very special someone, or pick one shot to print and frame.

Adult Toys 
Let's get the awkward giggle out of the way with this completely G-Rated image (I promise).  Okay, take a deep breath, we're gonna talk about sites that sell adult toys and movies. They're not for everyone, but let's face it, they can be a lot of fun. If you and your partner have talked about it, or currently use toys, you can check out these sites for some gift ideas. It's probably not wise to spring a vibrator on your unsuspecting sweetie, so you may want to broach the subject before gifting an X rated gift basket. These shops aren't limited to over-the-top toys, you can something in every category, from tame to extreme. If these aren't for you, no worries! It doesn't make you a fuddy-duddy (just like using them doesn't make you a big old perv), to each their own. I just love a good deal and a good time.
The following links will lead to sites with adult content, some of it is NSFW so please click with caution and at your own discretion!
Trojan Vibrations - One of the biggest names in condoms has recently ventured into the world of adult toys with an entire line of vibrators. They come in all different shapes and sizes, and are shipped in discreet packaging (as are pretty much all adult DVDs and toys).

Good Vibrations - Good Vibes is a reputable business that has been around forever. They're super user friendly, and may be a good option for first time toy shoppers. You can browse by type, size, material, even look at staff favorites. They also have an impressive selection of books and DVDs, as well as a great advise and Ask a Doctor area. Oooh, plus a free pink vibrator and shipping with a purchase of $65 or more.

Adam & Eve - Another company that's been around forever, over 40 years! They offer a lot of the same benefits as Good Vibrations, as well as a money back guarantee. You can get $10 off your order by signing up for their mailing list, and if you're really overwhelmed, their customer service reps are available by phone 24/7.

The Pleasure Chest - Further proof that I won't steer you wrong, this is yet another adult shop that has been around for 40 years. Their site is really easy to navigate, set up in sections so you can find exactly what you want. They also offer $7 flat rate shipping on all orders, which are (of course) shipped in discreet packaging. The Pleasure Chest also does in person workshops in various cities, current cities are Chicago, Los Angeles and New York. Oh, and if you're looking for some pop culture street cred, they've been featured on episodes of Entourage and Sex & The City. Real Housewives of Atlanta fans know Kandi Burruss launched her own line of adult toys, called Bedroom Kandi, which is available here.

And with that, my naughty little monkeys, our time this week is up! I hope your heart is racing at the thought of surprising your loved one with something special, whether it's naughty or nice. If you have any questions or comments, let me know. If you're too shy to leave the comment here, you can email me at vanessa [at], I'm here to get you through your gifting dilemmas!

*Pin-up image by David Wright


  1. For amazing boudoir photos (for all of you LA area whore(der)s), grab one of those AMAZING corsets and check out esme and eve @