Cheap Thrills: Black Magic

We all know I'm the gothic Whoreder, so it comes as no surprise that I love the darker side of life - and that includes my beauty products. What fine lady and dapper gent couldn't do with a little black magic in their beautification routine?

Shampoo/Conditioner
Let's start from the top, my long-time hair care companion, Aveda's Black Malva Shampoo and Conditioner. I've been using Aveda for 20+ years, and although I like to try new products now and then, I've never been without my beloved Black Malva. It's made for dark hair colors, and helps bring out the cooler tones while reducing red & brassy tones. I loathe red in my hair, I want it black as black can possibly be. As mentioned on Aveda's site, "Contains organically grown aloe, black tea and emollient-rich black malva that's been wild-crafted—sustainably gathered by hand in its natural habitat." 

Left: Black Malva Shampoo, Right: Black Malva Conditioner

Black Malva is part of Aveda's Pure Plant collection, and there are other flavors colors available: Blue Malva (for blonde or grey hair), Camomile (brightens blonde highlights), Clove (enriches brown hair), and Madder Root (for red & auburn hair).


Charcoal Skincare

Black Moon Charcoal Sandalwood Soap

Charcoal is another dark and lovely ingredient that can work its black magic on your skin. Activated charcoal can draw out dirt and muck from your pores, leaving you with super clean skin. You can use if for your face, or for your whole body - just don't forget to do your best Buffalo Bill Silence of the Lambs voice while you lather up. The first charcoal soap I ever tried was Shea Moisture, which is available at drugstores (I got mine at Target). But there are so many out there now! Here are some others I've tried and are on my to-try list: Coal Face from Lush, Origins Body Soap, Soapwalla's Charcoal Soap, and Sisters of the Black Moon's Charcoal Sandalwood soap.


Origins Charcoal Mask
 

Origins Clear Improvement Charcoal Mask

Origins introduced me to the world of charcoal years ago, and I still love their Clear Improvement Charcoal Mask. I use it a couple of times a month, and follow their recommendation to use a warm towel on my face right before applying the mask. The warmth will open up your pores and help the charcoal draw out the ick that got all up in your face. The 1.7 oz size is only $16, and will be enough for multiple uses, so treat yoself!

Boscia Black Mask  & Pore Strips
I am having a hardcore love affair with Boscia at the moment, their BB Cream blew my socks off and I've started trying more of their products (and falling deeper in love). I got their Little Black Book kit as a gift, it includes sample size versions of their Black Collection - all products that help control shine and minimize pores.

Boscia Pore Purifying Black Strips

Boscia's Pore Purifying Black Strips are like those disgusting but fascinating pore strips you may have tried in the past. Boscia kicks it up a notch by including charcoal powder (to draw out dirt and oil), silica (to control excess oil), witch hazel extract (tightens the look of pores), and willowherb (an anti-irritant to help calm skin and remove redness). Plus, hello, they make you look fabulous!

Boscia Luminizing Black Mask

My new favorite Boscia obsession, Luminizing Black Mask! First off, it's a peel-off - so you feel like a mad scientist or Christian Bale in American Psycho.  You apply a coat of the mask on your whole face (I just did my nose in the photos above), avoiding your hairline and brows. You wait for it to dry, about 30 min, and then slowwwwwly peel it off. If feels super weird and kind of gross, but SO GOOD. If you're a real weirdo (like me), you can save the peeled off sections to study later.

Nail Polish

Let's all agree that Karen O is amazing, okay?  That being said, her KnockOut (KO, get it?) Nail Polish is amaaaaazing! I especially love her Flatte Black, a black-black-black no-shine polish that comes in a beautiful bottle. I love flat nail color, hop aboard my crazy train. They also make a Flatte Top top coat that protects your polish while keeping the color matte.

Illamasqua also makes two really nice black polishes, Scorn (flat) and Boosh (glossy). I love their polish, it lasts a really long time and the color selection is gorgeous.

I've missed sharing my Cheap Thrills with you! I promise not to be such a stranger, if you promise to do that thing you told me about that one time.

Until next time, stay glamorous...

Cheap Thrills: 25 under $25

Since I took a little break and missed the last couple of weeks, I decided to do things a little differently. To make up for lost Cheap Thrills, I put together a big list of 25 goodies, each under $25. For you, for your friends, for your everyday gifting needs. Sometimes you need a pick me up that won't make a huge dent in your budget, or maybe you need a gift for someone but want to keep the spending to a reasonable amount... I gotchu covered, babies! Browse this list for a little inspiration, you'll be surprised how much fun you can get out of $25.

Swanky Sweepin' Volume 35

Daily:

Wine-inspired nail polish set  200 winners, ends 6/30

Weekly:

Charlotte Russe shoes  I believe I posted this a long time ago, but it is still running. Unknown expiration.

Single:

Trip to San Fran to eat a bunch of chocolate  Ends 5/31

Suki skincare gift card  30 winners, ends 6/11. Do not subscribe.

$350 Estee Lauder shopping spree  Ends 5/31

Round trip ticket through Orbitz  22 winners, ends 5/31

$1,000 giftcard from Barneys New York  Pinterest contest, ends 6/3

3 Zoya nail polishes  2,000 winners if it reaches 20,000 pins. Pinterest contest, ends 6/5

Trip to LA to meet Paula Abdul  Ends 6/5

CoolSculpting and a trip to LA  Ends 6/30

A trip to London and a bunch of vibrators  I'm not even kidding. Ends 7/13

Photo: Paula Abdul in her "Opposites Attract" music video

Serape Nails for Cinco de Mayo

It's that time of the year again... time to drink some tequila. Hopefully I don't fight a giant in a dark alley while in a dress and cute heels. That may or may not have happened to me before.

To celebrate, I decided to paint my nails like a serape! I hope they bring me warmth during the cold night.

Happy Cinco de Mayo! AY AY AY AYYY!

April Birchbox

It's Birchbox time again! This month the theme is "Natural Wonders", is stocked with products inspired by nature. So there are skincare goodies made with natural ingredients, nail polish that uses healthier alternatives, and perfume with natural and earthly notes. Perfect timing for spring, when everyone gets the urge to clean up, throw out yuckiness and charge into the season renewed and refreshed.

Let's take a peek inside...

March Birchbox

There was a slight delay in my Birchbox this month, do you think they were just messing with me because it was my birthday? Well... the real reason may be that there were two box options to choose from this month, the regular March shipment or the special Teen Vogue box. I'm not exaggerating when I say that I spent about 20 minutes staring at my email, trying to decide which one I wanted. Because I faced turning another year older this month, I went with the Teen Vogue box to make myself feel younger. Let's see if it worked...

Swanky Sweepin' Volume 25

Unlimited:

Nail strip set 250 winners, ends 4/30

Single:

Gorjana shopping spree 60 winners, ends 4/30

Trip to Chile 2 winners, recipe contest, ends 6/30

Japonesque brush set 10 winners, ends 4/14

$100 spa gift card 15 winners, ends 4/9, do not subscribe

24 piece nail polish set 131 winners, ends 4/30

A year of movies for you and a friend Ends 3/28

$100 2 winners a day, ends 4/1

Oscar-look outfit Email entry, ends 3/21

$1000 shopping spree at Topshop Ends 3/27

Kindle Fire and The Hunger Games trilogy 12 winners, ends 3/25

Photo: The Hunger Games

Swanky Sweepin' Volume 24

Daily:

Trip to Ireland Ends 4/1

Swanky Sweepin' Volume 22

Unlimited:

Trip to LA for two to hang out with Ron Jeremy Oh boy. Twatter contest, ends 3/22

Get Nailed: Flower Power

Spring is almost here but the weather in Ventura, Ca is still chilly. So to prep myself for spring and the hopefully warm weather it brings, I've decided to do a floral print on my nails. I tried multiple times to paint different styles of flowers until I found one that I liked.

1.) To start with, paint your nails with a light color for the base polish. I used Sally Hansen Insta Dri in Blue Blast which seems to be discontinued. My sister in law found it on clearance at Target for only $3.24. Added bonus, if you use $1/1 MF coupon and $1/1 Target Coupon, it would only be $1.24, if you can still find it...

Get Nailed: Cupcakes for Penny

My tiny terror Penny is turning two this Saturday the 4th ! Time sure flies. I decided to paint my nails for her. I combined three of her favorite things, sparkles, pink, and cupcakes!

1.) Clean and prep nails with a clear base coat, let dry.

2.) Next I used OPI Italian Love Affair on all but my middle fingers. On my middle fingers I used Sally Hansen Mint Sorbet. I used 2- 3 coats on each nail, but remember to let nails dry between coats !

3.) On my ring fingers and thumbs I used Milani Diamond Dazzle because Penny LOVES "sparkles".

4.) On my pinkies I did polka dots (using a paperclip) and on my pointer fingers I did stripes. Both patterns were done with Milani White Canvas.

5.) Now for the fun part, the cupcake! I painted the bottom half of my middle fingers in bright pink using Essie Surfer Dude (no longer available). I then put stripes through that pink using Milani Draw in Pink. Together, this makes the cupcake wrapper.

Next I chose a medium pink for the cupcake itself using Milani Tip Toe Pink. I made sprinkles on the cake using Milani Nail Art in Blue Print, Green Sketch, Draw in Pink, and White Canvas.

6.) Last thing I did was I used Nicole Berry Sweet for the cherry on top, and slap on a clear top coat and voila !

I went home last night and Penny saw my nails. She said Momma pink nails pretty, OOOOHHH SPARKLES!!! And then she did her sign language for cake and got really excited, mission accomplished ! :)

Get Nailed: The Tell-Tale Heart

Hello my pretties, this week's nails are inspired yet again by Valentines Day, but with a twist. My husband is a nurse (yeah, big whoop, wanna fight about it?) so this weeks nails are a nod to him as well.

1.) As always, prep nails by removing all polish, file down nails, and apply your base coat.

2.)Next pick a base color. I used an Urban Outfitters Polish in purple (even though it looks blue in the pic's) Let dry completely.

3.) Take a nail art brush, I used Milani Nail Art in White Canvas to make the EKG lines across my nails. The great thing about this is they don't have to be perfect, and there is no set pattern, so have fun with it!

4.) I chose my ring finger to draw my heart on because I'm corny and believe in "Vena Amoris".

For this, I used Milani Red Sparkle, which is quickly becoming one of my favorite polishes.

5.) Last but not least, I cleaned up the edges, applied my top coat, and voila!

Get Nailed: Baby You're a Firework !

I've been thinking and thinking....and thinking about what the heck to do for "New Years" Nails. Now that it is far passed New Years, it came to me lol. Firework nails! I googled and Pinterested ( Yes, I made that word up, and no it will not catch on like "Googled") the crap out of firework nails, new years nails, explosion nails etc. I kept coming across this picture but I couldn't find a tutorial anywhere.

I finally found the original picture at nailside (which has tons of awesome nail designs by the way), and you can find her instructions here. I'm glad I started on my own because I was a little confused by her instructions anyways, but that's just me. However, I also didn't find the tutorial until I started my own version lol.

I say mine came out pretty dang good as seeing it was my first time trying these, and I didn't have the instructions to begin with. I tried to cut a zig-zag pattern out of scotch tape that would fit on my nail but it really is much easier to cut small triangles out of scotch tape like nailside suggests. I used Milani One Coat Glitter in "Purple Gleam" (which is really "two coat glitter") and O.P.I "I Get A Kick Out Of Gold" for a Any way that you do it, I'm sure it will come out fun and good looking (much like myself). Well Whore(der)s, I'm off to slowly attempt to paint my left hand now. Good thing fireworks are erratically shaped.

Get Nailed: This Little Light of Mine

There are many things I love about Christmas, but my absolute favorite thing is the lights! I love them so much that I went a little overboard and painted them on my nails! I was originally inspired by TheBeautyDepartment's fun and unique tutorial where Lauren uses actual string for her string of lights. I am not that ambitious, nor do I have string on hand, so I improvised.

1. Prep your nails with a good base coat. I got a new one when I took advantage of Milani's Cyber Monday sale (I went a little too far buying bought 26 polishes), and I love it so far. It really gives you a smooth canvas to work with!

2. Apply your base color. I went for a fun, holiday gold O.P.I., which happens to be a super rare polish that I found laying around Heather's desk.

3. Next, I took my new Nail Art Polish in Black (also by Milani of course), and made loops to resemble a string of Christmas lights (minus the lights).

4. I used three more of new Milani glitter polishes to dot on lights. You can use any color you want, just have fun with it!

5. Follow with a good top coat, and voila, you've got some fun(ky) Christmas nails!

Get Nailed: Out Damn Spot!

So usually I write about how i did me some awesome nails, but this week, I'm writing how to undo these damn nails I did last week! Imagine my surprise went I went to remove my O.P.I. nail polish, and it didn't come off! What is this world coming to when you can't even count on O.P.I nail polish ?? ?Okay, maybe that was a bit dramatic, but I looked like I fingered the Hulk. Yeah, I said that, now deal with it.

I don't know if any of you have ever suffered the embarrassment of the dreaded "Nail Stain". It usually occurs when you don't use a base polish, use a really cheap polish, or a heavily pigmented polish. I never knew how to completely remove the polish stain, so I usually just painted over it, but this time I ventured  to my magic machine (the computer), and researched (aka Googled) the hell out of it.

I found the simplest way to remove the stain is this:

1) Remove as much as you possibly can with Nail Polish Remover.

2) Get  a cheap manicure kit, and go to town! No seriously, buff and smooth your nails with buffer stick (I may have made that name up) push back your cuticles and cut them with the cuticle pusher/cutter, which is super easy (even thought it looks scary). Next clip and/or file your nails as necessary. Lastly use the "Shine aka Side 2" of the "buffer stick" to polish your nails, and voila, the stains are gone! At most, this took me 10 minutes for both hands.

                                

    IT STARTED LIKE THIS

(DON'T JUDGE ME, I WASN'T DONE CLEANING THEM UP YET)

Get Nailed: That's a Wrap

Yay, December is finally here, and all I can think about is presents...err the presence of Christ. The Wisemen brought presents to Jesus (is it weird that I pronounce it Jesús in my head?) so maybe Christmas really is all about presents? Well whatever your take on presents and Christmas (or Hanukkah for that matter) is, I decided to paint my nails like a present in anticipation of the holidays.

What you will need:

Clear base coat

Solid Polish

Clear top coat

Nail Pen or Nail polish with an art brush
A gem or glitter polish

Get Nailed: *Special Edition* Movember

This week, I did a fun and easy pattern for my nails. I used Essie Mod Squad polish for the base, which I got for $2.99 on clearance at Ulta and have been dying to try! I used my Milani Black Magic polish (and a toothpick) to create the black polka dots and my Sally Hansen Nail Art Pen in Black to draw mustaches on my middle fingers. Mix it up any way you want, and make it you're own! 

Get Nailed: By Dr. Seuss

My daughter and I have been reading Dr. Seuss beginner books lately and I came across a set I really like but hadn't read before; Put me In the Zoo, and it's sequel I Want to be Somebody New!. These are really fun books (that happen to be on sale) by Robert Lopshire and they teach you all about colors and other fun things. She seemed to really like the main character who is a yellow and red spotted leopard. Since we were already having mommy and me time by reading together, I figured we could paint our nails (and our faces lol)drawing inspiration from this kids book.

Get Nailed: By the Dead

Get nailed by the dead? Whoreders say what??? No I'm not talking about necrophilia you pervs, I'm talking about Obituary Newspaper nails, duh! So now you're probably even more confused which perhaps means that you are eagerly reading to find an answer to what all this cray cray-ness is about.

Well, I'll tell you, it's about this awesomeness!
                                             
                                                  BAM!!!!

Get Nailed: Orale Ombre

Ombre is all over the place these days. First it was ombre hair, and now it's ombre nails! Ombre is a French word that quite literally means "shaded". Think, gradient colors. Since I am a (non) certified nail artist, I thought I would tackle the ombre nail for your viewing pleasure. There are three different ways you can do it.

Type 1: Take five shades of the same color and paint each nail a different shade. For a slightly more unique look, you can take one dark color that is your absolute fave, and on a flat non-porous surface (table top, Ziploc bag, paper plate, etc.) make four tiny puddles of polish. Next, add small amounts of white polish to each puddle to lighten them up, each to different shades of the same color.

This look is the most simple, and sort of reminds me of junior high. It is still pretty, but by farm the most simple of the three.

Type 2: Take two contrasting shades (one lighter than the other) and using the lighter color, paint your nails as normal. While polish is still a bit tacky. Make sure you have a make-up wedge or an eye make up sponge applicator and dab it in the darker polish. Next, using the applicator, sponge it onto the nail, heavier on the tip, and lighter towards the middle.

This look was big on the Fall 2011 and Spring 2012 runways this year. They achieved this look by using an airbrush, but for those of us who can't afford to airbrush our nails all the time, I have a shortcut!You should get something like this, which is my personal fave!

Type 3: I like to call this one the "candy corn effect". There are two ways that I know of to achieve this look. You can simply take three polishes and do three horizontal stripes across your nails. When almost dry, use a clear polish on the entire nail to blend the look. Another clever way to achieve this look is to use scotch tape, as seen here!

Pictures from refinery29, QuirkyChic, and NailPolishReview