While researching another article about really cool and useful baby gadgets and gear, I found some not so useful or practical parenting paraphernalia that I thought I'd share with you.
#1 Po-Knee $21
Yes, this is exactly what it looks like, a plush pony you strap to your leg. It takes "pony rides" to a whole new level .
#2 Zaky Pillow $45
Hand shaped pillows. Yes, I'm serious. According to the company, " It was originally designed to comfort, support, and protect premature babies that had to be away from their mother in the hospital – but it is a great ergonomic pillow for all infants! It has been shown encourage good sleep patterns and sound development, while providing a sense of protection. It is very flexible and can be positioned just right to fit the perfect position for your little one – over, under, or around your baby. Place it in the drier for a couple of minutes to warm it and give it a more realistic feel". Bottom line? Creepy yet sweet AND practical
#3 The Daddle $56
I don't care what anyone says, this is awesome. Necessary? No. Hilarious and demeaning? Yes! For a cheaper price, and hilarious reviews, check the Daddle out on Amazon ($45 avg price). I'm really not kidding about the reviews...go now and read them.
#4 The Baby Keeper $40
If no one knew and could never prove that I used one of these, I totally would. Have you ever tried to go pee in a public restroom with a baby? It is seriously difficult. Maybe one day they will start having these next to purse hooks in all public restrooms...hey a mother can dream can't she ?
I seriously cannot stop laughing at this. I understand that the Peekaru is supposed to be more comfortable for mom and baby than most baby carriers because it is a full upper body vest, however, why must it look so ridiculous? You can even "wear the baby" forwards or backwards for your convenience, ha. And what about the headrest? In theory makes sense for supporting a baby's wobbly neck, but in actuality it looks more like a torture device or restraint.
#6 Baby Toupees $22 or Baby Bangs $30
Have you ever seen those babies that are dressed in a non-descript white onesie or a "gender neutral" color or pattern and you cannot figure it if they are a boy or a girl? You know, the kind of babies where you say generic remarks like "Your Baby is so cute", or " I love that outfit:". Were you one of those babies? I for one was not, I was lucky enough to be born with a full flowing mane a la Fabio or My Little Pony . But for those unfortunate "Baldies" out there, your problems have been solved by the Baby Toupee and Baby Bangs! They come in a variety of colors and styles and are all $30 or under!
#7 Baby "High Heels" by Heelarious $30
Heelarious are "heels" made for tiny tots ages 0-6 months. Pair these with a Baby Toupee or a set of Baby Bangs and you've got a Diva in the making.
#8 The Tinkle Tube $6
This is one product that worries me. As most of you know, I am having my first boy in September. Every single time I think about potty training him, let alone changing his diaper, I start to panic and hyperventilate. I don't have a wiener, and I don't want one but it seems I have no choice in the matter this time. I originally came across potty targets and thought they were the most ridic potty training tool...that is until I found the Tinkle Tube. Per the company's website all you need to do is "stand the child on or in front of the toilet seat with your assistance. Be sure to hold the child securely at all times to prevent him from slipping and falling. Unzip or pull down the boys pants. Remove both caps from the Tinkle Tube. Place the Tinkle Tube over the boys little soldier. Now hold and aim the tube towards the toilet. Shake the tube out, rinse and replace the caps. Store the Tinkle Tube in your bag for the next use."
NoThankYou.
#9 Potty Mitts $5
This is another "what-you-see-is-what-you-get" product. I'm not sure what happened to the good old fashioned art of hand washing but these potty mitts are exactly as advertised; they are disposable hand mitts used to ward off germs in public restrooms. Make sure to read the FAQ's so you know not to flush the mitts, or wipe your child's butt with them.
#10 Frida Baby Products $15 ea.
Frida products make me want to die. I heavily debated even putting these in here but once I saw them, I couldn't un-see them and it just wasn't fair that I be the only person to have been scarred by knowing these exist. On the left, you will see a NoseFrida, a nasal aspirator that uses your mouth as the suction device . On the right is a Windi, "the Windi is a single-use catheter that helps babies get rid of excess gas" AKA a fart tube. I cannot elaborate any more on these products or I will barf...but at least if I do, I can do it in style.
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